31 December 2010

Why Is He So Scared?

It seems that K is terrified of so many things right now, and I don't know why or how to help him.

-Haircuts.  He's terrified of them now.  He used to be fine.  He'd often be a little nervous, so I'd pretend to cut the fur on one of his animals, and I'd let him feel the clippers, and then he'd be fine.  I tried cutting his hair a couple of times before Christmas because he's looking shaggy, but he screamed.  I mean, blood-curdling, inconsolable screaming.  So he hasn't had a haircut.  In the words of my dad, the worst that can happen is that he grows his hair down to his waist and becomes a musician.  I still wish I knew what brought this on and how to help him.

-Baths/Showers.  This one has been going on for a few months.  He used to love taking a bath, and now it frightens him.  I know this one is in part because of his new fear of shadows, and is in part because he hates water running down his head, whether it goes in his face or not.  When we put him in the bath, he screams to get out.  It doesn't matter which one of us gives him the bath, either.  He used to like it if we put C in with him, but she hates the bath, too (she loves the shower, though, and gets upset if someone takes a shower without her).  I do have K's bath down to a fine art, so he's only in there for a minute, tops, but it's not getting better.  If anything, it's getting worse.  Bath toys don't help.  B's talked to K about shadows, and even tried doing shadow puppets, which K finds amusing at times, but no luck.

- the dark.  It's a struggle getting K to sleep at night lately.  It's not his room, because he takes naps in there without any problem.  At night, however, he screams if we try to leave him in his room for bed.  This is the same routine we've had for at least a year, so it's not like it's something new.  This just started after Christmas.  The past couple of nights he's wanted us to keep his light on, so we do.  But he still screams when we try to leave, so we've tried letting him start out in our bed, with the lights on in there.  The problem there is that he'll just stay awake in there until I come up with C.  I usually let C unwind a bit and then breastfeed her to sleep, but if K is in the room, she gets really hyper and won't go to sleep.  So while I'm trying to get her to calm down, K wants to be held and is tossing and turning and won't go to sleep.  Last night I put him back in his room after 30 minutes of struggling with the both of them, and I told him screaming wasn't allowed and reminded him that God is with him, and his guardian angel is watching over him, and that Papa & I are nearby, but that he needed to go to sleep.  It actually worked at that point, but hadn't earlier in the evening when I'd tried that same exact thing (in addition to blessing him with Holy Water, as we do every night).  After K went in his room, I got C to sleep easily.  Unfortunately, K still awoke and came in with us, and then cried when B moved him back.  If he would actually sleep in with us, it wouldn't matter so much, but he doesn't always do that and instead tosses and turns much of the night.  It also doesn't seem to matter what time he goes to bed, he wakes up fairly early.  Today he actually slept in (for him) until after 7.00, but he's usually up around 6.00.  He needs the sleep, he's just having trouble right now.  I don't know if part of it is that my parents have returned home, or not.  He did ask for PowPow (my dad) at bedtime a few nights ago, so maybe that's part of it.  I don't know.


  1. unfortunately, i won't be much help. my children are unfortunately fearless about everything. WEMM doesn't like the dark, so we've gotten her those touch lights and let her have one during the night. it's different than a night light, she can move it if she needs to, etc.

  2. He has a nightlight, but that doesn't seem to matter. It's progressed from him just needing the nightlight, to needing the hall light, to needing the room light. *sigh*